Wednesday, March 04, 2009

The Best Test

by Kelly

Calling all parents of small children! Time to update your baby book! Remember that chore you began before your eldest was born? There was a time when your little precious was the entire sun of your family orbit with their infant needs. You swore you’d keep it up to date and fill in every line in an effort to recall every “Da-da” and diaper. Your spare time while your little precious napped would be dedicated, in part, to this token of memorabilia. OK. You can stop laughing now. How many years ago was that anyway?

Present day, it’s hard to fit family time in your child’s schedule, never mind yours. Our strong parent-offspring connections may need a refresher. (Especially if you refer to the warm family fuzzies as the “parent-offspring connection.”)

My dear friend Beth sent me this Mommy Quiz. Beth’s whip-smart seven year old son answered the quiz and his answers were remarkable. These simple questions revealed how he views the world and feels about his mother. It showed off his sense of humor and let his smarts shine. It demonstrated the level of comfort and security he has in his relationship with Beth. This test showed what he values and how he truly appreciates her as his mom. Good stuff!

Then it hit me! It is a wonderful method for strengthening the family bonds, as well as a terrific gift idea!

You can use the back cover of your baby book to make a great addition to the memories. Be sure to record your child’s age when quizzed, the date, and be sure to write out the questions as well as the answers. The insight gained will be priceless when your little angel is taller than you. The quiz should take about twenty minutes.

Here it is:
Ask your child the questions and write down exactly how they respond.
1. What is something mom always says to you?
2. What makes mom happy?
3. What makes mom sad?
4. How does your mom make you laugh?
5. What was your mom like as a child?
6. How old is your mom?
7. How tall is your mom?
8. What is her favorite thing to do?
9. What does your mom do when you’re not around?
10. If your mom becomes famous, what will it be for?
11. What is your mom really good at?
12. What is your mom not very good at?
13. What does your mom do for her job?
14. What is your mom’s favorite food?
15. What makes you proud of your mom?
16. If your mom were a cartoon character, who would she be?
17. What do you and your mom do together?
18. How are you and your mom the same?
19. How are you and your mom different?
20. How do you know your mom loves you?
21. Where is your mom’s favorite place to go?

The gift idea here is to substitute “mom” with another family member. I plan to do this with “dad” in place of “mom” for my husband for Father’s Day. You can quiz them about their siblings and grandparents – imagine the answers! If you know a special mom, you can ask her child these questions and record the answers for a super special gift.

Of course, the time actually talking with the child, and being truly interested in their thoughts and feelings and perceptions is the real gift here. Not just for you but for them. The quiz is twenty minutes of your undivided attention. When was the last time they had that?

So if you’re starting to feel little more than a chauffeur, maid and chef to your little precious, take twenty minutes to see how you really are so much more to them. I suspect their perspective may change yours. 
Cheers!

Kelly