Health Check: Separation anxiety

While many parents have no problem getting their kids in the back to school groove, it can be a trying time for some.

First-grader Lucas VanGossen has mixed emotions about heading back to school.

“I’m a little excited, a little not,“ he said.

VanGossen had what turned out to be a great year of kindergarten last year, but its rocky start is something that his mom, Barbara, still remembers.

“When we would get there, there were times when he wouldn’t get out of the car,“ she said, “times when we would walk him in and have to sit for a while.“

Licensed therapist Chauntelle LeJeune said that many young kids who enter a new environment will experience separation anxiety.

“You’ll see crying, you might see phone calls home from school on a regular basis where the child’s complaining of a stomach ache, headache, they threw up, but then you get them home and everything’s good,“ LeJeune said.

Four percent of children between the ages of six and 12 have significant struggles with separation anxiety.

“If it continues for weeks and weeks and it’s starting to escalate,“ LeJeune said, “then you know you have a real issue on your hands.“

The number one way to reduce the stress and anxiety is to establish a routine.

“Routine is comforting to children, so if there’s more of a routine happening, then there’s less chance of anxiety problems,“ LeJeune said.

Talking to your child in a casual way about what they’re feeling can open up a dialogue where assurance can be offered.

“I would try to explain to him that we would never leave him anywhere unless we knew he was perfectly safe,“ said Barbara VanGossen.
For Lucas, his anxiety was alleviated within the first couple of weeks of the school year thanks to consistency and comfort from his parents - and a nugget of wisdom from his kindergarten teacher.

“His teacher told me, ‘once you’re gone, he’s fine, this just isn’t his first choice - his first choice would be to be with mom and dad,‘“ Barbara VanGossen said.

While it’s difficult for parents to let go of their upset child, as the time lapses - the tears of the morning will become something of the past.

At the beginning of the school year, parents of young or anxious students should walk into the school building with them, meet the teacher and encourage their child about the positive aspects of the day.

If crying and clinging persists for more than a few weeks, you should contact a professional for coping advice.